Ela 3.5 years

July 12th my first baby turned 31/2 years old.(Yes we celebrate half birthdays). 

I am in awe, more like denial that she is almost 4 years.

So what's happening with my little Ela....

 My 6.11 pound squirt is now almost 35 pounds and just reached over 3 feet! 

She loves to eat! (Just like her mommy) Anything and everything in such a big girl way!

She has pierced ears.

She was a first time flower girl...Took her job very seriously at that!

She is the boy I will never have. Even wearing pink and a big bow, 

she still can find dirt in the cleanest of places.

The imagination she has is amazing. She dreams and thinks of anything.

Nothing will stop this girl from reaching her dreams.

She loves posing for a picture and wants to wear her purse everywhere...just like mom.

Will always be a joker and avoid bed at all costs...

Can make her own fun anywhere...Even in the rain she makes the best of things.

Is hardly shy by any means. She loves being herself

How do you know...

A few times a week, if not a day, I am reminded. It really stood out when we recently traveled to Atlanta for my brother's wedding. Here's how it starts. In the airport, countless people would first give me the look of pity. You know what I am talking about; the look like "Bless your Heart" for traveling with two young children, the look like "I hope I don't get a seat behind you", the look like "Did you really need to pack all of that stuff". Immediately after comes a smile, and then the kicker. "Enjoy them while they are young". They then go back to reading their book or head to the bar kid  free and walk the other direction.

I don't want this post to come off as me being over-sensitive, as 99% of the time the person is being genuine and probably reminiscing back to the young days of their children. Is this just a cliche that every mom of older children feels they have to say? As a mother, I am sure you have heard this phrase countless times over the years. Admittedly it is hard to stop and enjoy your children when your are arm deep in changing diapers, your clothes constantly smell like spit up, you rarely get to eat a meal without an interruption, and 6 hours is considered a great night of sleep. How do you know I am not enjoying them?

There is not a day that goes by that I don't sneak into my daughters room and watch them sleep even though the day was long and I was looking forward to a break. Or on my train ride to work, I sit on my phone and look at their pictures, when I only left them a few minutes prior. Or placing countless kisses through the day on those soft fat cheeks they have. Or letting my oldest sneak in my bed to cuddle when my husband is traveling. Or let my youngest wake up to feed in the middle of the night because she will only be a baby for so long. Or taking a million pictures of them,knowing no one finds them as cute as I could. I often find myself just staring at them thinking "How could I have made something so beautiful".

So the next time you think to say "Enjoy them while they are young", take a second to think twice. Although I might look completely overwhelmed, tired or  covered in spit up I am enjoying EVERY minute of it.

7 Months- Julia

 6 months is a half a year, however 7 months is just a little bit closer to ONE! As nostalgic as I get, Julia is just as happy now as she has been the past 7 months. You can always find her smiling.

We had many new first this month!

*Julia started solids. I am making my baby food and doing a combo of baby lead weaning and purees. She is not a huge fan of food yet, but when she finds something she likes she will let you know.

*Julia is sitting! The first few days she was a little wobbly and now she just wants to see the world. She HATES being on her back now.

*So the no back thing, means first time sleeping on her belly. She only did it once and I wont put her on her belly until she does it herself . Even for a second time mom it is nerve-wracking!

*Julia went to her first wedding! She was passed around to everyone and smiled the whole time.

She looks nothing like him right?! ;)

Not the best family picture but it was a feat to get this!

*First Boat Ride- We technically didn't leave the dock, and it really qualified as a house, but none the less she was on a boat!

*This was a one time thing and we propped her up...BUT her sister walked at 9 months. Wonder if we  are going to have another early walker?

A few other notables:

* She moves her whole arm up and down to wave

*She says "hi"

*Giggles away! All.the.time.

*First time eating cake(courtesy of Ela)

*First tooth- FINALLY! 

Its a strange first. Bottom right canine.

It is really hard to believe that this little black haired, dark eyed newborn is the same blue eyed baby.

The picture on the right cracks me up...She makes some crazy faces with those big eyes.

Conversations with my Toddler- Chapter 5

Every time you see her she is smiling.
She brings so much joy to us every day with her wit,
sass, and good humor. Too.smart.for.her.own.good.

Conversations with my Toddler- Chapter 4

Conversations with My Toddler- Chapter 3

Conversations with My Toddler - Chapter2

Conversations with My Toddler

Walking home from school:
Ela: Can you carry me?(I have Julia in the Bjorn)
Me: Honey I can't I am carrying Julia.
Ela: But your not pregnant anymore, that's not fair.

Ela after getting a skin infection on her leg/bum area laying on the couch.
I am going to have to stay here forever because my bum bum hurts too bad. Maybe I can even eat dinner here.

Ela: I am Doc McEla. Are you under the weather?

Ela: I like Tata, I like Mommy, I like Julia....but I LOVE myself.

Ela: See my baby?
Me: Yes, she is cute.
Ela: She is one year ago old.

Ela: Mom, ask me what I wished.
Me: What do you wish?
Ela: That my boobs made milk too so I can feed my babies.

Ela: I want milk for bed.
Me: Ok, In a few minutes.
Ela: "No butts about it lady"

I wake up to find Ela in my bed....
Me: What are you doing in Mommy's bed? Did you get scared?
Ela: No, I am here because you are my Mommy and I love you.

A few days later...(Toddlers are so moody)
Me: Tata's at work tonight do you want to sleep in my bed and cuddle?
Ela: No thanks. You take up too much space.

Ela and Julia playing
Julia coughs...
Ela: Julia, didn't Mommy teach you to cover your mouth. That's really not nice when I am trying to share with you.

Me: I am so tired today. (I lay down on the couch.)
Ela: Why dont you go to sleep Mom, I wont wake you up and I will watch Julia for you.

Ela: Mom, I need a spoon
Me: What for Ela? You are eating french fries.
Ela: I don't want the french fries, I want to eat the catchup.

After the 5th time of asking Ela to go to bed.
Ela: I just cant because someone left the light on outside.

Ela: Mom what is wrong with Julia?
Me: I dont know why?
Ela: She farts all the time and she smells.

Ela: I cant eat this chicken.
Me: Why?
Ela: It has nuts on it.
Me: No, it does not. And besides you are not allergic to nuts anymore.
Ela: Ok then it has seeds on it. (she still is allergic to sesame)
Me: Nice try Ela.

Ela: Aunt Amanda whats this? (pointing to the mailbox)
You can so tell that she is a city kid!

And the best yet... The girl has my back!
I am feeding Julia and I screamed because she bit me. Ela asked what happened. I tell her. All of a sudden she comes rushing over. "Julia, mommy is my best sweetheart. If you bite her nip-pole again, I will break your teeth and you wont get any more milk." "Do you understand? "

Julia -6 MONTHS!

Julia is such a smiley little bundle of joy. 9 times out of 10 she is grinning at you. The only time she is fussy is when she is hungry(duh, who wouldn't be). By the looks of her chunky self, breastfeeding is still going strong even though we had a few bumps in the road.

Stats:

15 pounds even

25.5 inches long

16 inches head

Whats New?

*Rolling front to back/back to front

*Inching forward, legs half up. I suspect we will have

a crawler by the 7 month update.

*No more swaddle

*Knows her name

* Follows voices around the room

*Grabs/Grasps/Reaches

*"Talks" more and more

*Loving Tummy Time

*We had two "almost" waves. Buh Buh

*Sleeping in the crib

Firsts:

*First real food. Bananas, blueberries, 

carrots and sweet potatoes

She has not had her first Halloween yet...
Poor second kid hand-me-downs!

* Hanging out in a swimming pool

* First taste of an ice-pop. Thanks to big sister! Oops

I turned around and it was in Julia's mouth too! Whoops!

The funniest part of Julia is the way she sleeps. She has always been a good sleeper from the beginning and can literally sleep through anything! Although the crib/no swaddle transition has proved otherwise but we are ready for our good sleeper to come back!

How being "Type A" possibly saved my life

I debated on whether to write this post. This blog has been my family's journeys for the past 4 years. The good(mostly) and some of the bad. So I decided to write about it.One day many years from now I will read this and remember how I felt. Now what do I call the post? Only after visiting the doctor, did it come to me.

There is really no way to say this and make it  pretty, so I will just say it. Exactly two weeks ago today I was diagnosed with a blood clot in my brain. Cerebral Venous Sinus Thrombosis to be exact. This form of a blood clot is extremely rare and effects 5 people out of every 1 million. In 2012, Hillary Clinton was diagnosed with one and fully recovered.

This is a picture of the venous system in the
 back of the brain. The area that is not white is the clot.
 *Not my brain; just a picture

What Happened?
Mother's day was wonderful. Actually Tomasz had a great weekend planned and I got to spoil myself a little. Mother's day weekend always happens to fall around our anniversary as we got married on Mothers day.I had a great weekend, but Monday at work I started to feel ill. I had a headache and thought maybe I had too much wine the day before. Later in the day I had some random tingling in my arm. I ignored it, and went to bed that night. Tomasz was traveling for work.The next morning I had tingling in my arm and leg. I went to the doctor and was told to go to the Neurologist with instructions that if I could not find one go to the  ER. I called many Neurologists and finally found one that said I could come and wait in the office. If she had a break she would see me. I came in and she looked at me, and saw me right away. I was sent for an MRI of my brain. I had a series of three MRI's scheduled which take 30-35 minutes each. That means no moving for 90 min. In the middle of the second one, my whole body went numb and I had to stop. The technician said don't worry the last one is the least common place where clots would form; come back tomorrow. I woke up Wednesday and headed to work. I was in a meeting and all of a sudden I had no feeling on my whole left side. I got scared and immediately went to the Emergency Room. By the time I arrived I could barely walk. I had some blood-work and another MRI. My Magnisum was low. While laying in the bed, I googled signs of low Magniusm; numbness was a sign. I got an IV and expected to be sent home shortly.Problem Solved. I had been in hospital for 7 hours already and assumed no news was good news about the MRI. And then my heart sunk. The hospital actually paged my neurologist and she came to the hospital to inform me that I had a small 3mm clot in the left side of the veins in my brain. (These are the veins that remove  blood from the brain along the side of your neck). I was told I would be sent home(what???) with blood thinner injections and in a few weeks I would have a follow up MRI. I begged to stay in the hospital. They assured me that I was healthy, and that with thinners my trusty body would re-absorb my clot. The risks of contracting a disease were higher than something happening at home.I opted for the injections vs. a pill as they were safe for breastfeeding. It is extremely important to me to breastfeed, and all my doctors agreed if it made me happy I should continue. I practiced giving an orange injections and  then gave myself the first dose of Lovenox in my belly. Its good I have a little extra postpartum cushion left over!

What was the cause?
Right now we don't know the cause. CVST is common in  postpartum women, although I am a little far  postpartum. They have not ruled it out. Another risk factor is birth control. I had a Mirena inserted after having Julia. I've never felt right on it since day one.I actually had an appointment the following Monday to have it removed unknowing of the clot.Finally, I went to the hematologist today for extensive blood testing. This will rule out or determine if I have an underlying clotting disorder.

My Emotions
Over the past two weeks, I have had so many emotions. First was "why me"? Why did I get this, and why such a rare disease at that. Then the "why me"? Why did I have symptoms and catch it early instead of having a stroke? I go back and forth. As bad as this is, I am lucky that it is SMALL and I caught it early. Did I do something to cause this? My girls; this has been the hardest part. I came home and would cry looking at them. I could not think about not raising them. The first two nights at home, Tomasz was my rock. In my head I thought if I went to sleep something would happen. After much anxiety and tears, Tomasz talked to me until I crashed from exhaustion. God(and Julia) must have known how bad I needed the sleep because both girls slept through the night.

So after all this how did being "Type A" possibly save my life?
I googled " Best Hematologist in NYC" the day after I found out. I found a doctor that had many articles published, positive reviews, and was basically amazing. It took two weeks to be seen. It would have been longer if I had not explained my situation(and begged). So flash forward to today and I am sitting in his office. He comes in and looks at me and asks if I am in the wrong place. He goes on to say I am one of the youngest patients he has seen in a while. By the looks of the waiting room, he was not kidding. I tell him my story and he states that I am the first patient he has seen with CVST. He then asks how I found him. I told him my Google story. He goes on to say, you probably Google diagnosed yourself prior to even going to the hospital right? I look down embarrassed; doctors probably hate patients like me. Yes, err... I mean kind of. He asked why I turned to Google. I explained I had to know what was wrong and the causes and basically I am very Type A. He laughed and said being Type A probably saved your life. I am very glad I am in touch with my body as well as knowing when its reached its threshold. I also have learned in the past to trust my "Mom Gut". I also had been chalking up random symptoms like headaches and neck pain to being postpartum and tired.

Whats next?
Next week I get the blood-work results back. In mid June, I have a repeat MRI to see if the clot dissolved. By Saturday of this week the numbness had faded for the most part. Sunday was the first day I felt normal. No headaches, no numbness. Just a sore belly from the injections. I will take that any day. Breastfeeding is going great and I snuggle my girls and hubby a little extra each day. I pray to God to keep me healthy and thank him for keeping me alive.

How I Met Your Father...

I am(was) a huge fan of How I Met Your Mother. Its very neat to see a show that chronicles how ones' paths could cross. More often than not, I am sure this happens to many of us.

And this girls.... is how I met your Father. <ba baba ba baba baba)

Girls weekend 2008 in Vegas with one of my good girlfriends Susan (over at Real Life Travels). Instead of conquering Vegas as we had planned to, it conquered us, and I was headed home. I had not showered in 24 hours. On that flight home girls, I met your father in all my hungover glory. If you meet a man when you are at your worst, you know he is really interested. We had alot in common and chatted the whole flight. He never got my phone number, but invited me to go flying with him. After an awkward goodbye, I called my sister and said " I just met my future husband and will never see him again". Thank goodness for technology and social media. Six hours later as I was searching for him on Facebook, I received a message. " I know I never got your phone number, and you dont have to say yes, but I would like to take you flying. Here is my phone number" I replied back saying " I dont call boys and gave him my phone number". 15 minutes later my phone rang.


And so came our first date...

Dont let the smile fool you, I was scared!

And many more after that. In 2009 we were engaged.

Rainiest, ugliest, but best day. The man had a plan and stuck
to it, even in the rain!

In 2010 we were married

And in 2011 and 2013 we brought our two beautiful girls into this world. 

Julia's Baptism- Ela 3 years Julia 3 months

On Friday, we celebrate our 4 year wedding anniversary. Dare I say the old cliche that time really does fly by? We have been through so much together and accomplished so much for our family and careers.

As much as he drives me nuts, I love him that much  more. ( I am sure I drive him equally, if not more nuts)

 I get frustrated when he pushes me hard to accomplish my goals,

 but I know he does it because he believes in me. When I want to give up, he wont let me. 

Even though I hate to admit it, he does make me laugh; even the times when I don't want to.

 No one will deny that he is full of passion. The same passion that sometimes drives me crazy is what landed him his dream job.
 

He is also equally passionate about having fun and traveling; the thing I love best about him.

 He is such a dreamer...

 He is a wonderful father to our girls. I swear it was meant for him to have two little girls because they already have him wrapped around his finger. He is gentle and sweet with them and they get lots of love from him.

We have never been the couple that says "I love you" all the time, but rather show me that you love me people. I highly suggest all couples read the 5 Love Languages. Looking back at the pictures today I would say our love has grown in many ways; figuratively and literally.